I spent 3 solid days obsessing over grout color so you don't have to...

When you tackle a complicated project like, say, tearing the roof and walls off your house, you want a large team of experts on your side. As seems to happen in many life-altering adventures (parenting comes to mind), you start with a few hand-picked experts. And then your team grows. Slowly and organically at first and then suddenly reaching cartoon proportions.

That’s exactly where we are now. My team of invested experts now includes, but is not limited to: architect, builder, husband, vendors, subcontractors, friends with great taste, friends with strong opinions, family members, children, neighbors who I adore, neighbors who I don’t even know, designers on Houzz, strangers who comment on designers on Houzz, the lady in the checkout line at Home Depot, the guy at the veterinary clinic who overheard my phone conversation....

For better or worse, as we near the end of the remodel, this team is still right beside me, weighing in on every last little decision.

 

Me: So I’m doing all white subway tiles in the kitchen and the new baths. Same size everywhere. You know...clean, crisp and affordable. Classic and modern all at once. I’m looking for a sense of continuity. I love it...decision is done!

Expert 1: Actually the grout color will make all the difference. It can radically change the look of the whole room. Radically! Don’t believe me? Let me show you 5,000 photos as proof.

Expert 2: White on white is really the only way to go.

Expert 3: Only boring people do white. You aren’t boring.

Expert 4: I tell all my clients to go one step darker than the color they most like.

Expert 5: I tell all my clients to go one step lighter than the color they most like.

Expert 6: I tell all my clients to go with their gut.

Expert 7: Dark grout doesn’t show dirt.

Expert 8: White grout can be bleached.

Expert 7: Dark grout is more modern.

Expert 9: Dark grout is too modern.

Expert 7: Light grout is too traditional.

Expert 8: Light grout is more versatile.

Expert 10: This brand of grout doesn’t stain.

Expert 11: Don’t believe them--all grouts stain!

Expert 12: Black grout will look like the '80s threw up in your kitchen.

Expert 13: Look at this photo of black grout! It’s perfect!

Expert 3: It really boils down to what you want the tile to say about you.

Expert 14: It really boils down to resale value.

Expert 15: Did you decide how thick your grout lines will be?

Expert 4: You don’t decide how thick your grout lines will be. Expert 17 will decide how think the lines are.

Expert 8: You should DEMAND to know the thickness of your grout lines before you go any further!

Expert 3: Silver grout? Yesss! That color is so you!

Expert 2: Silver? It’s really the only way to go.

Expert 12: Silver? This was my favorite all along, I just didn’t want to sway your opinion.

Expert 8: Silver? It’s all over Houzz, but don’t worry you are still original.

Expert 16: Silver? Do you mean Silver or Titanium or Platinum or Pewter?

Expert 6: I know you want Expert 16 to make this final call, but Expert 16 is not going to live in your house with this grout color. You are going to live here and see it every day. I cannot stress the importance of this decision. You need to dig deep and rally. Cancel today’s plans, get back in the car, go to the showroom, and pick a color. You will not regret it.

Expert 16: Ok great. Silver it is! Now let’s talk about floor colors...

Expert 3: Why are you crying?

 

*     *     *

It's a blog hop! My friends have also done something wildly awesome or awful so you don't have to. Read about them here...

I Wrote Another Godforsaken Blogiversary Post So You Don't Have To - Ann Imig

I Toured Washington DC in a Night Bus So You Don’t Have To - Wendi Aarons

I Listened to KidzBop So You Don’t Have To – Midlife Mixtape

I Had Food Poisoning While Sitting On A Diaper Genie So You Don't Have To - Smacksy

I'm Surviving October So You Don't Have To - The Flying Chalupa

*     *     *

 

2014.10.05.house-3

Silver it is.

2014.10.05.house-6